The Prodigal Daughter

I have returned old friends. I realize it’s been over seven months since my last post, but I’m back and have monumental adventures of labor and motherhood to share. Here are topics I’m going to expand on throughout the next couple of weeks:

First of all, I did NOT have a natural birth. I will post my fiancé’s rendition of what happened tomorrow in a separate post with added commentary from me along with pictures of the birth and aftermath.

Secondly, my son is the most beautiful perfect little package of human I’ve ever laid my eyes on. Every facial expression, vocalization, and movement he does makes me feel as though my body is pulsing with melted chocolate instead of blood. My good friend and birth coach Lia Berquist-Fletcher once told me, “Wait ’till you realize every love song you’ve ever heard was really about your child”. It’s true, he’s the love of my life.

Lastly, we moved/drove across the country. My family now lives in Philadelphia, PA.This really should be divided into two or three posts. We’ll see how it goes.

Before I go, I’d also like to refocus the purpose of this blog. It’s more so a narration of my life rather than a journalistic take on the healthcare industry and how it interacts with natural birthing. I would like to still investigate that further, however the primary theme will be much less specific and much more casual-motherhood and living life.

Labor Limbo

I recently have joined the millions of women who are stuck waiting for labor to happen to them. When will this tiny human I’ve been incubating for a week short of ten months make his appearance? I hope soon.

Here is a Haiku I wrote recently after a false labor episode:

Stuck in Labor Limbo

Did my water break?

Or did I just pee myself.

I just peed myself.

Amen.

Keeping Up With The Holsbys

To Whom It May Concern at the Lady Factory,

I’d like to register a formal complaint, please, because I sincerely believe that your engineers were a tad hasty in the signing off of this project.
I would like to preface my complaint by saying I truly feel that many features are perfect. The lady lumps and curvy bits are generally to my liking, and I have to say that on the whole our genitalia is considerably less hilarious in appearance than our male counterparts.

Generally speaking, the female reproductive system is truly amazing, however, I do feel that the method of expelling a baby from the body could do with some tweaking.
In theory, your current methods works quite well, but there are a few fundamental design issues that ought to be addressed for the evolution of the next prototypes.

Primarily, I’m referring to the certainty that a vagina does…

View original post 302 more words

Beach Cities Midwifery

A couple of months ago, I decided to browse local (well, local-ish) birthing centers. I set out with the goal of finding a birthing center that would accept standard Medi-Cal. After all the hospital horror stories I’d heard, I just wanted piece of mind that my delivery wouldn’t be a constant struggle of abstaining from medication. However, my financial situation severely limited my options, or so I thought. Read more…

Jim Gaffigan and Home Birth

I’m in awe of Jim Gaffigan right now. Not only is he hilarious, but his wife had four home births in their apartment. I’m assuming he used The Bradley Method, because he describes himself as “coach” in his standup, a definite Bradley term.

Wrapping Up My Eighth Month!

This Monday marks the beginning of my ninth month of pregnancy, so I wanted to share a few pictures of me from the past couple of weeks.